By Dzung Vo in June 2005

i watched a woman die tonight

a forty-nine-year-old woman
with a sudden, massive stroke
we did everything quickly
we did everything right
and still, she didn’t make it

my day in the emergency room
was a twelve-hour-long adrenaline rush
it was only later, after,
that i realized:

this woman wasn’t ready to die

a lively african-american woman
just forty-nine years old
with a loving husband and children
she wasn’t ready to die

death is a daily event
in the san francisco general hospital’s
emergency room

i spent the rest of the evening in meditation

walking the mission district meditation
staring out over the bay meditation
tears meditation
sitting meditation
breathing meditation
hot milk and croissants meditation
angel song meditation
reading Buddhist poetry meditation

writing meditation

tonight i go to sleep
wondering if ghosts will be visiting me
in my dreams